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  • Alice Bull

Why we can lose confidence during menopause and how to start rebuilding it.

Menopause is a significant transitional phase in a woman's life and all women will go through it, some to a greater degree than others. 

It marks the end of a woman's reproductive years and whilst it brings about various physical changes, it also impacts mental and emotional well-being, including confidence levels. Many women that I have worked with have found themselves struggling with a loss of confidence during this time, which can have a big impact on their ability to perform tasks effectively at work and home.

According to the British Menopause Society, 20% of women at work are affected by a loss of confidence during menopause. This can be at a time when they are reaching the peak of their career and can cause increased anxiety around their ability to perform their role.

In this blog, I'm going to explore why women may experience this shift and offer practical tips on how to improve confidence during menopause.

Understanding the Confidence Shift:

The hormonal fluctuations associated with menopause contribute to both emotional and physical changes for women. If a woman is not prepared for these, the symptoms can be alarming and confusing. 

As estrogen levels decline during menopause, neurotransmitters in the brain - which are responsible for mood regulation - can be affected, leading to feelings of anxiety, irritability, and low self-esteem.

A reduction in testosterone can reduce mental sharpness and clarity, making it harder to focus or remember important information. 

Additionally, menopause often coincides with other life changes, such as children leaving home, career transitions, or caring for aging parents. These external stressors can further exacerbate feelings of uncertainty and self-doubt.

Furthermore, physical symptoms like hot flushes, night sweats, and changes in body shape can impact how women perceive themselves, contributing to a decline in confidence. 

The combination of these factors creates a perfect storm that can leave women feeling vulnerable and unsure of themselves during menopause.

Tips for Boosting Confidence: While the journey through menopause may present challenges, there are several strategies women can employ to start rebuilding their innate confidence in order to embrace this new phase of life.

1.     Self-Compassion: Menopause is a natural and inevitable part of a woman's life journey. It's essential to practice self-compassion and remind yourself that experiencing fluctuations in confidence is normal during this time. You are not alone! I always find it comforting to chat to friends and discover that they too are going through similar experiences during menopause. Be gentle with yourself and acknowledge the courage it takes to navigate these changes.

2.     Prioritise Self-Care: Taking care of your physical and emotional well-being is crucial during menopause. Make self-care a priority by incorporating activities that promote relaxation and stress relief into your daily routine. Sophrology is a wonderful technique to learn during menopause as it teaches you to relax your body and calm your mind, enabling you to rekindle that inner confidence.

3.     Stay Active: Regular exercise not only helps alleviate physical symptoms of menopause but also boosts mood and self-esteem. Find activities that you enjoy and make them a regular part of your routine. Whether it's walking, swimming, dancing, or yoga, staying active can improve confidence and overall well-being.

4.     Talk to friends and family: Don't hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or support groups for guidance and encouragement. Sharing your experiences with others who understand what you're going through can provide validation and reassurance. I have witnessed the power of speaking up when delivering my 'Sophrology for Menopause' sessions to groups of women. Sharing their experiences has enabled others to offer support and enabled those suffering to not feel alone.

5.     Focus on Positive Self-Talk: It's not possible to be positive all of the time, but starting to become consciously aware of how you talk to yourself is the first step in being able to change your inner voice into a more positive tone. 

If you imagine your negative thoughts as a path through the woods that has been trampled down consistently, it becomes easier and easier to follow that path, to believe those damaging thoughts. Starting down a new positive path is not easy, but the more you focus on it and repeat it, the easier it becomes to travel down. As you neglect the old negative path, it becomes overgrown and abandoned.

Remind yourself of your strengths, accomplishments, and the resilience you've demonstrated throughout your life and you will start to build new constructive mental pathways.

Sophrology enables you to access the positive memories and thoughts in a relaxed mental state. When your mind is calmer, it is easier to recall past successes and notice how the body responds. Once you can start to embody confidence, it becomes easier to recall it in times of uncertainty or fear.

Menopause is a transformative journey that can bring about profound physical, emotional, and psychological changes for women. While it's natural to experience fluctuations in confidence during this time, it's essential to remember that you are not alone. By prioritising self-care, seeking support, and embracing self-compassion, you can navigate menopause with greater confidence and reassurance that you already have all the tools to flourish.


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